I’ve been on a plan talking about goal setting for a few days now.
The focus has been on understanding goal setting from God’s perspective and not merely what the world tells us.

Every day on the plan, I’ve seen something that has linked to one main thing and I’ve seen how important this one thing is and have understood the reason why the devil has it on surveillance and under attack constantly.
It is the power of moment.

All the things you’re concerned and worried about right now don’t necessarily affect your now, or this moment but rather, it’s something that happened in the past or something we’re looking to in the future.
We get so carried away with either or both and forget the Now.

When the devil succeeds in taking the Now from you, you’re not able to enjoy the phase you’re in at that moment because it’s either what I should’ve done or what I should do that you’ll remain focused on and daily, it’ll drain you till you even look at that moment and not see any worth or good in it.

I have aspirations, oh God, I have aspirations, i’m sure you do too, I also have things in my past I’m not proud of or I feel differently about now, but I’m intentionally learning to focus and be appreciate of the moment I am.
To focus on the Now and plan for the next step, not the 10th step or the 20th step but the next step.

It doesn’t alter or eliminate your future focus or inner drive, rather it allows you focus to actually learn all the things that need to be learnt and will be useful for that place you’re headed.

There’s power and value in This moment.
Don’t get carried away with what you think you should’ve done or where you think you should be and pressure your now out of an equally important phase.
Take a few minutes and observe and appreciate the environment you’re currently in, the activity you’re currently doing, and the thoughts at the tip of your memory.
Embrace it and learn from it.
Moments don’t last, but there’ll always be the past and the future.


Embrace the settings on the washing machine

Once again, I forgot to turn the knob of the washing machine to the wool icon. So it washed my wool in cotton temperature, intensity and speed.

So my beautiful woven sweater came out shrunk, slacked and just not the same.
I was extremely mad.

Fast forward to the same night, I was reading about fabrics. Not for any particular reason but as I read, I became more knowledgeable on the temperature, intensity and speed for each fabric depending on its material. And I saw that if you exposed a material like silk to high cotton temperature, you can say bye to whatever clothing that is.

Majority of us go through trials and we wonder, really genuinely why we need to pass through whatever it is, and there’s that quiet but true questioning to God like ‘what’s going on!?’. We’re not insinuating that everyone doesn’t have their share of trial but yours just seems like it’s to an extent much more or more serious than what others appear to be facing.

I’m not telling you that you’re special or that your blessing is bigger.
Rather, your fabric can just stand that temperature, intensity and speed. You were made with your own guidelines and any influence that would shrink or slack you to the point of destruction wouldn’t exactly come near you so glory in the fact that the temperature you’re in, with its intensity and speed, you’ve been designed to withstand it and still come out looking fresh and clean.

The washing machine isn’t the greatest example but at least know that exposure to temperature, speed and intensity varies with people so embrace your share of trial and await the end of the spinning.

Summer School ’18 FAQ

We’re over the head excited about the Summer School coming up this August/September.

A lot of planning and organizing have been put in and we’re just waiting to have our girls and train and teach them to be the best of themselves.

As per the flyer, it is a vocational and Leadership Summer school so we’re focused on developing the skill-set of every girl and also training on personal/self development and of course, discussing career paths and options as per Foch woman aims and objectives.

We’ve had a load of questions coming through with regards the summer school so we put together an FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions), that might be helpful to Participants and their guardians planning to attend.


Foch woman is committed to the growth, development and empowerment of young girls and women across the world, this means that whatever it will take to help us equip young girls for their future, we are all for and about.

The summer school is going to be an environment to learn and develop skills, whether new skills or developing from previous knowledge from well-informed and experienced individuals.

As we create and develop, we have sessions where we’ll actually seat and discuss issues close to the heart of young people today and take direction from the bible to know how best to navigate our way around.


We would not organize this if we didn’t see a benefit in it, for any young girl involved in the summer school this year, we hope to give you a platform to know yourself better by exposing you to different skill-sets and teaching and training you in new things.

We’re attaching mentors to girls which also gives you a sort of ‘Big-sister’ to talk to even beyond the Summer school.

Meeting other participants also gives you an opportunity to network and make new friends and in the end, to remind you of all your hard work and dedication, we will present you with a FOCH woman Vocational/Leadership Certificate highlighting all you would have learnt in the week.


August 25th, 27th, September 1st, 2nd and September 8th is the Variety day where we’ll allow parents and guardians come and see all we’ve been up to. It’ll be more of a social evening to showcase all we learnt through the last 4 days.

It’ll be 10am – 4pm daily and Guardians will need to drop and pick their kids daily.

Every participant will receive an outline of the program for each day after payment has been made.


We have an Eventbrite link which takes you to a form to fill and allows you make payments there.

Alternatively, you’re able to speak to any of the organizers or call +447440284657

As we have limited spaces, we strongly advice that you register your interest as soon as you decide you want to be a part of it.


Foch woman prides herself in a network of reliable and committed girls and women who are also walking on the FOCH path and so are equipped to train and raise younger girls.

Guardians will have an opportunity to meet with their daughter’s mentor for the summer school if they want to and are also able to speak to the organizers about any concerns they might have, but be rest assured that your girls are in the best hands here in Portsmouth.

In the mean time, you can meet the FOCH team here.



I honestly think our generation has made a mistake believing or entertaining the thought that everything you come across is for you to take, imbibe, learn or begin to live out.

It’s the only explanation I have for the rants and arrogance I see or read each time someone states their opinion

I think at some point, we’ll all learn that even though there’s a place for society, there’s a bigger place for individualism and individualism in the right context.
Individualism that works with principles and values, it’ll help filter out the clutter that our world is filled with.

You come across something that does not edify you in any way, walking away doesn’t make you a looser or a propagator for the evil that it might be, it’ll actually reinforce your stand in your principles and untimely save you your time and sanity.

It’s not passivity, it’s another way to say deliberately choose what catches your time and attention.


Another Tuesday


I woke up today remembering that it is another one of my long day.

I think it is a mental thing I’ve done to myself but it is now a norm for time on Tuesday to appear to be a lot slower than normal. I’ve not been able to understand it fully but I notice that every Tuesday, when I look down expecting to see a time, I always see an hour or 2 hours before that time, and to be honest, it’s not much of a shock anymore.

Monday’s appear to be my fastest day and Tuesday’s, my slowest.

It is expected and  very possible for me to begin to dread every Tuesday. Like waking up every Tuesday morning and going like ‘aaarrrggghhhhh, another Tuesday, another long day’ but when I wake up every Tuesday morning and remember ‘Oh, Rubie it’s our longest day’, I get up and do what i’d normally do on a Monday or any other day.

Today, I quizzed myself about this and I wondered why it didn’t bug me that it was a Tuesday each time I woke up on a Tuesday morning.

I realized that no matter how long a Tuesday lasted, it always, always came to an end. Like, even if I looked at the time expecting to see 4pm and I saw 12noon, I might be pissed but i’m reminded that no matter how it drags, it will end.

I don’t know why it was this period that this realization hit me, but as it came, I remembered all the stories I’ve heard in the last week about all the people who decided it was time to leave the world by themselves due to one reason or the other.

Added to that, I watched about 10 minutes of ’13 Reasons why’ as I waited for my friend yesterday and saw how this beautiful teen girl created 13 videos of the 13 reasons why she took her life.

As I listened to the 13 reasons why she did what she did, with her counselor being the 13th reason (LOL), I realized that none of the reasons were permanent. None of them was going to last forever, in a nutshell, she would have left high school from the people bullying her, healed physically and mentally from the rape she’d been through, got a job and left her uncaring parents and found friends who appreciated her for who she was.

This is not me being insensitive or undermining the gravity of what she felt. To be honest, I don’t even know what she felt because pain is like our finger print. No one truly knows where or how it huts. But my point is how neither of the reasons were permanent.

Same way my Tuesday will always come, but cannot stay forever, no  matter how long it drags.

It is a theory that we all have to intentionally learn that ‘Nothing lasts forever’. Particularly on the negative side. Things always get better, and even when they don’t, we get better at handling these things.

Think of all the things you want to end this minute. If you critically look at them, neither of them will be forever. One day, it will end, and guess what? You’ll probably still have a new list then.

I want Tuesday’s every week to remind you that though it may last, it will end.

My heart goes out to all the people currently going through anything that just you know about.

Here’s something my dad said to me.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

Feel free to ‘reach’ out too to talk. Just maybe you’ll feel better.

Stay where you are forever?

I was having a quiet day at work so I got to reading something on my computer when a discussion among a Senior manager, my Manager and an Analyst ensued. Because it was right opposite me, I could hear the conversation word for word.

The Senior manager was talking about how young people of these days don’t like to stay in a place for too long and how they are changing jobs after every year or two. He was comparing it to his time, how they started their careers there and grew through the ranks.

My Manager could also identify with him and they talked on and on, on this topic.

While what they said held a lot of truth, I don’t think we can deny the fact that time has really changed and one of the biggest differences I’ve seen with our time and the time of our parents was the fact that they were mostly out to provide for themselves and their family really regardless of how they did that. So most of them took this advice and went into careers that they probably had no love or joy for/from but because priority was family, that didn’t really matter.

With time, some of them found happiness, while others just got comfortable with the jobs and have since forgotten that it’s not what they always wanted to do.

With our generation, were being advised happiness. Most speakers of our time will tell you to ‘do what makes you happy’, ‘don’t take a job that you don’t find fulfillment in’, ‘your happiness over the money’.. and on and on, so I’ve found that most people in our generation will choose happiness over settling.

I thought this might explain why young people jump from job to job annually. While some actually just like the life, most are looking for their ‘happy place’ and i’m a believer in the fact that this actually exists, but the idea is really to create it, not to look for it in a place.

Half way into their conversation, the analyst with them got excited and started telling them how they have her forever and how she was here to stay and all and if I want to be honest, I sat there thinking in my head like ‘whattt?, you really want to be here forever?’

Ps. I work for a beautiful company and I have the most amazing Manager but I’ve known from when I received my employment letter that this was seasonal, not permanent, so my thoughts weren’t because of the company, it was more the analysts’ career desires.

And that’s where I made the mistake, to think that she  carried the same aspirations that I did. It took me a while thinking about the whole conversation and my reaction to the statement from the analyst that I realized that the analyst had found her ‘happy place’. It was obvious in the way she worked and her relationship with most people and I was truly really happy for her when I came to this realization.

I think you’ll always recognize your happy place when you get there, this analyst arrived there faster than most in our generation which I think is pretty cool.

Here’s the catch though, your happy place ties strongly with your purpose and who best knows the purpose of a thing than it’s creator…

I want you to spend some time thinking about the last statement but I want to know more what category of the 2 generations described above you fall into, regardless of your age.

happy place



Forgive that I took this long to write on the final woman in the series of ‘Bad girls of the bible’, I’ve been up and about, nonetheless, nothing of all I’ve been up to is excuse for not posting the final part.

On the other hand, for some reason, I got really excited knowing that the last was Jezebel. You don’t really need to read the bible to know her story.
Her name is tossed and thrown at every female that wants to look like a ‘devil’, in her words or actions.

As crazy as it sounds, I identified most with Jezebel among all the women in this series, (Yes, you might want to go say a prayer for me… lol)

But really, Jezebel’s story shows us how crafty and intelligent the devil is in taking the amazing strengths and gifts God has given us and turning them into things that look ugly to the point you don’t recognise the blessing they are.

Jezebel was wilful, powerful, Intelligent, in-charge, and she had the most critical and analytical mind. She was the definition of astute in the best way possible. I realise that it is so hard to see all of these qualities in the story written about her but remember that the devil can be anything but a creator!

What he does is he takes what God has created and twats it to be something ugly. He sabotages God’s creation to abuse what God originally created it for.

In Jezebel’s case, He took all of those qualities highlighted above and made them to what you see in the bible. Not without Jezebel’s consent though.

And this is where my lesson from Jezebel came.

God has truly blessed us with all spiritual blessings, inlcluding beautiful talents, rare gifts and unique personalities. But the devil is constantly seeking to take this beautiful gift and make into something ugly..

We can’t allow him, we should never allow him.

For me, it is a daily conscious thing now, I have a tendency to come off as Jezebel did, and that makes me hold on to the Holy Spirit all the more. I fault here and there but once the Holy Spirit convicts me of it, I repent and forsake the thought, word or action.

Let’s stop allowing the devil take glory for what he is incapable of creating. Let’s stop allowing him take the beauty out of what God has created.

Let’s daily deliberately and intentionally work at allowing what God has created find expression in its natural state. And the natural state of anything God has created is BEAUTY-FULL.

I challenge you to write down all the supposed ‘bad’ things you notice about yourself. When you’re done, ask God to open your eyes, so that you can see the gift God has blessed you with that the devil has taken and turned against the purpose God put it in you for.

If you do this exercise right, you’ll be mind blown!


>>> Comfort Zone <<<

I like to tell myself I get out of my comfort zone often.

But recently, I’ve been convicted about the lie that the above statement is.

Today though, I did something very out of my zone, good, but crazy and I actually spent the whole day reminiscing on how it all transpired and thinking if it could have gone better or gone worse.

First of all, this is a good sign that you are actually out of your comfort zone so keep going until you can relate with the paragraph above.

We’re having an event in my church called ‘All Nations Sunday’ and it is one of our biggest annual event because we go all out for it. It’s our biggest evangelism tool too as a church and i’m grateful for how far we’ve come really.

Because we need to raise awareness for the event, intentional and constant evangelism and flyering is important. So on my way to work this morning, I made sure to carry a bunch of the flyers with me because I had a plan and a goal for the day.

I got to the train station and got into my train, walked through the train dropping flyers on seats because I noticed that I read extensively the flyers I meet on my seat so I thought to myself, ‘this has to be the best strategy’ (although nothing really beats word of mouth evangelism’.

I got to where I would seat and saw a woman seating right behind me.

It was a 10 seconds battle of ‘Give her or not give her’.

I decided I’d walk up and hand her one.

I got about 5 inches from her with a smile definitely too wide for 7:30am in the morning and I handed one out and said my ‘Sales pitch’.

I wish I can tell you she smiled back, asked more questions and collected it but sadly, I can’t.

This beautiful young woman, stopped me half way, raised her hand to my face and said ‘It’s too early in the morning, please’.

She was polite enough to say please and I respected that, but I was crushed.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been rejected before, even in similar situations like evangelism but something about today was different.

I apologised, got to my seat with my wide smile that had become a straight hurt line.

I’m still not completely over it as I write this but what’s really funny is that I’ve felt a kind of peace even with the hurt. I’ve also felt really excited knowing that I was completely out of my comfort zone.

I can’t tell you it was an amazing feeling, especially at first but what I know is, I probably won’t feel this bad if this happens again and I’ll be so much more confident next time I have to do it *brushing nothing off my shoulders*.


We actually cannot do great things in our comfort zone. In our comfort zone, were protecting ourselves, our image, our reputation, our face and our security but outside, we’re letting all guards down and open to what might come our way and that’s where growth will happen.

I’m excited for the next few days left to evangelise and flyer.

Dear Foch woman,

Stop playing it safe all the time. I promise, the growth will exceed the hurt if you even meet any hurt like I did. Slowly but surely!

The Sinful Woman

Another unnamed woman in the bible 🙃

I was sure she had a name till I returned to read the story properly and realised she was referred to as the sinful woman.

As most stories in the bible, we are not really given an introductory or background story to this woman, she literally just made an appearance in that chapter, although theologians argue that she had been previously mentioned in the bible.

There’s something precious about this sinful woman, from the few chapters about her in the bible, it seems like she had received a revelation prior to going to see Jesus in the Pharisees house.

No one just approaches someone and begins to cry and kiss their feet and anoint their head with oil, that’ll be really creepy. So I’m convinced she had been visited prior to the scene where we see her loving up on Jesus in the way and manner she chose to.

The sinful woman reminded me how powerful silence is in God’s presence, sometimes we feel we always need to be saying something but a lot of times, silence does the trick.
There was literally no exchange of words between her and Jesus till the last verses when Jesus told her that her sins were forgiven.

She also taught me what it means to zone the world out and focus on what truly matters.
Can you imagine the scene she must have created?
Walking into a dinner party and going to just one guest, crying, kissing His feet and pouring perfume on His head ???

At that moment, she couldn’t care less, she had come for something and not even the judging and accusing eyes piercing her could stop her.

In our time, there’s enough things to zone out, enough distractions that are veiled in things that appear important.
But we need to ask God for focus and clarity to ‘see the focus and focus on the focus’.

#TheSinfulWoman #BadGirlsOfTheBible #Focus

sinful woman


Ideally we should remember Michal as the wife of David but more than half of the time, shes either not named or named last as David’s wife. Ironically she was the first woman David married.

Michal definitely suffered some deep emotional trauma because the bible expressly describes how she loved David, but not once did it mention how David loved his wife, so similar to Potiphar’s wife, she was in a situation that definitely was not favourable but still did not justify her actions.

She was also not mentioned a lot in the bible but the few chapters she appeared in were either sad or scary.

We never see it this way but Michal had the opportunity to be the woman after God’s heart. She was married to the man after God’s heart regardless of the situation leading to their marriage, so nothing could’ve stopped her really, but we see that her love for David was actually a hazard to her love for God and her ability to sense situations clearly and without prejudice.

She was obsessed with this man named David and the obsession started long before they were joined together in Marriage.

Her lesson was a powerful one for me personally because sometimes, we excuse some things we adore in our lives because they are good or right but we forget that the moment we place anything above or on the same pedestal with God and/or our relationship with Him, we’ve set ourselves up for a disaster.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman loving her husband like she did or with a child adoring his mother or with a student working to get to the apex of their academics or career.

These things in themselves are very good but when we begin to move things in our life to rotate around any of them, we miss the goodness it could bring to us like the way Michal met and loved (goodness) but ended a tragic way.

Michal’s story taught me to know God for myself and LOVE Him, I dare say the extent to which Michal loved David.

#Michal #BadGirlsOfTheBible #Love

poisonous love