Recently a friend of mine reached out to explain some difficulties she was having with maximising space for her wedding, as it was a strictly by invitation wedding. She had probably gone over her invited guest-list, and in comparison to the seats available, she realised she had to cut down a bit.

She reached out to me saying she was going to have to split couples, meaning invite a husband and not a wife or vice versa. While I totally understood her dilemma, having been in same shoes just a few months ago, I advised her to remove the couples completely and replace with singles.

It was a sensitive topic so I thank God for the wisdom to have been able to present it the way I did. I explained to her some of the impact that could have on her relationships with them going forward and how she was also putting the invited partners of the two in tight spots; informing their partners that they’re having to go for a party but without them.

Maybe it’s the impact of the new paradigm I’ve been stepping into on unity and oneness, but I felt it strongly in me to caution her that way and I’m so glad she listened.

It didn’t sit right with me to separate a head from a body, even in something as transient as a wedding party.

Earlier today I lay in bed and my mind was cast back to a few weeks ago where I got into a heated conversation about church and pastors, it was so heated that it took everything in me not to break down mid-way through in ugly tears.

I didn’t like how they sounded speaking about the church and pastors and for some reason, I was also struggling to present my thoughts well.

They raised very solid and valid points against some of these churches and pastors and while I was careful not to give credence to some of the evil that has crept into the church today, I was also struggling to stand fully on their side because somewhere at the back of my head was a picture of a strange looking body; A clean, pure and untouched head, but fixed on a bruised and battered body.

The bruises were more from the backlash of the same body, than bodies of other heads.

Later that night, I would pray from a deep place in my heart asking God to open our eyes to the oneness of Him and His body (us). Help us see that we can’t revere Him in one beat and turn around and be intentionally irreverent to His body.

Thinking more about it this morning when the Holy Spirit reminded me of the conversation I had with my friend, I realised that it’s same mindset manifesting; seeing a man and His wife as one and seeing Christ and His church as one.

When the church and those in it mess up, our first reaction must be compassion and empathy, never judgement and disregard. Even when we feel the impact of the failure of the body, for the sake of the head, we must respond in compassion and love.

More than anything, I’m convinced that we should be praying a lot more than we talk about church and it’s members, for each time we have a word to say about church, we should’ve prayed more times for that one word. Our judgement must not exceed our love.

Because of the failure of men, the church of God has had such a big hit and while it is understandable, it does not offer a valid point to us as members of same body to hit ourselves.

We must tend to this body with love, even if it’s just on account of the head.

Let’s pray for the body and the appointed shepherds over the body. Let’s not allow the world pollute our minds to become so suspicious of ourselves to the point where we will first stand against ourselves before we stand with ourselves.

It communicates to a head each time his body is treated well. Same way a husband will revere a person who reveres His wife. God also sees our love for Him as a whole by how we treat and respond to His body.

So let’s take it easy, choosing first to pray for ourselves before judging ourselves. It’s one whole body; the head fitted on the body.

Everything the body does reflects either positively or negatively on the head, so even when our neighbour has done something that reflects negatively on our head, let’s not give the head more fish to fry by judging, but by seeking both prayerfully and practically by wisdom to tend to that other part of the body until they’re restored again.