Sometimes growth is very glaring obvious and other times, it is quite subtle and not the most obvious thing, but one major thing with growth is that time always bears it witness, because over time, however quick or slow it comes, it is still evident, maybe first by people around and then by the person them self or vice versa.
A couple of days ago, I fortunately happened to be aware of growth in a certain area and I can’t even begin to explain how happy it made me, I literally was grinning ear to ear when the Holy Spirit opened my eyes to it and as I always do, I whispered a little “Thank you sweet Holy Spirit”.
I got home from a social gathering with girls at my church and I sat braiding my hair in the mirror and reminiscing on my day and I started to recount the things that I definitely didn’t need to say, things I could have said better and things that I definitely could have emphasised even more. I was making a mental note basically of how better to articulate myself when next i’m out with people and taking note of the things that I did say that I really shouldn’t have for one reason or the other.
The Holy Spirit whispered “Yesss Rubie” and I was like “Huh???” and He took me down memory lane to thoughts of past Rubie and I remembered that before, whenever I got home from social gatherings, while reminiscing on my day I would highlight everything that everybody else said that was not right and then think of what they should have said rather than what they said and analyse why they said what they said and i’ll now determine whether they meant it purely or were just being sarcastic.
It was so funny, I would literally think of everyone else and what they did and said apart from myself, what I did and said. So I wasn’t really developing or examining myself as the bible commands us to, rather, I was criticising others and examining others which left me without any growth on my part and more cynical and paranoid of other people.
It is so funny how sometimes we don’t even recognise the little things that cause the really big things and it’s amazing that the Holy Spirit is able to open us up to those little foxes that we would ordinarily dismiss as nothing.
I literally sat there laughing with my hands on my head and I said to God that I was grateful for this mighty leap as small as it seems.
This mindset also put me in a place where I have minimum expectations over people’s character, I understand that I am responsible for my own action and inaction and not that of other people. It is something I see God teaching me even more these days and I have to encourage you to join in as well, God is interested in YOU first before everyone that you think He should be interested in. He works with us individually and if we’re not focused on the work He’s doing within us because we’re distracted by the work we think He should be doing in everyone else, we would not experience the growth that He is trying to facilitate in us.
When it comes to evaluation, examination and scrutiny, the Holy Spirit wants us to start with ourselves first, not the person who we believe was wrong. We should always start with the Man in the Mirror (I so hope you catch this pun!!!)